Today’s post is about something that I wish I would
have known early on in my hair journey. I was originally going to post this
later on, but today I was at church and
several people asked what I do to my hair to get to get it this way. Of course
I shared what I do, but then I always end with what works for my hair may not
work for your hair. In particular I was talking to a mother and her daughter
and they were kind of at a point of frustration with their hair. I knew EXACTLY
how they felt. The frustration with natural hair is the never ending battle.
These women both had amazing and gorgeous curls, but they just couldn’t get the
results they were looking for. I could see their curl potential and so I am
posting this sooner then I wanted to, but I think that the timing is perfect
and necessary. Something I believe could have helped me get to where I am a
little faster, but what good is a lesson learned without a journey traveled? What
I'm about to share with you could have you questioning everything that you know
about natural hair and the methods that you use to care for your hair. Before I
share this information with you it’s going to require a few things from you. I
need for you to be open and willing to temporarily forget everything that you
know and everything that you have learned about natural hair so far. Some of us
arrived at the decision to go natural by mistake or intentionally. I am one of
those people that ended up there by mistake I had no clue what being natural
was all about. I started my hair journey before it was the trend it is
currently. I'd never heard of it, all I knew was that I didn't want to get
another relaxer. I remember stumbling on an article by Oprah’s hair stylist on
hair typing, for those unsure as to what hair typing is click here. The
discovery of this system, at the time, felt like the answer to all my questions,
but in retrospect it was an avoidable obstacle in my hair journey. Something
that I've learned in general outside of hair is that we have an unnatural
obsession with labels. We feel more comfortable and confident when a label is
attached. Labels allow or dictate to us how we should handle ourselves or what
we should do in order to stay in that label. This is why I’m against hair
typing, because you treat the hair that you think you have based on the label,
rather than treat the hair that you actually have. Instead of exploring on your
own to find the products that work best for you hair you rely on hair typing to
tell you the product that would be best for your hair type. It took me almost
eight months to realize that the only thing standing in the way of having the
hair that I wanted was my label obsessed mindset. What I am about to share with
you is what I wish someone would have to told me!
Treat the hair that you have, not the hair you want. I am guilty as sin for this, as long as you treat the hair you aspire to have, you will never have the hair you desire. In order to get the hair you desire, you need to be realistic and you need to treat the hair you have. Let me explain what I mean when I say that. If you DESIRE to have curly hair, but you have straight hair, and you buy products for curly hair, well then the outcome will be very disappointing. If you have a very coarse and kinky texture, then it is unrealistic to think that by using a product that the outcome will be wind blowing, springy, and bouncy curls. No matter what you use that will not be the outcome, so don’t waste your time, money, and patience on products that do not treat and nourish the hair that you have. The sooner you come to this realization, the sooner you will begin to get the results you want. Become more educated on what works for your hair, not what you have been told works best, by trying new products. Experimenting has been one of the best parts about being natural is trying new products, but don’t let it clean out your pockets.
The perfect moisturizing product DOES exist. Yes you read right, it DOES exist, and you already have it, so take your shoes back off, put your car keys down, and put your wallet back in your purse. Water is the ultimate and ONLY true moisturizer. I don’t care what you have read, what video you have watched, and what YouTube guru said, WATER IS THE ONLY TRUE MOISTURIZER! Oils, cream, butters, deep conditioners, leave-ins are all used to trap water in. Most people will say chose a products that has water listed as the either the first or second ingredient, well why spend money on a product that will provide moisture, when you can just use water. The moment that I learned this, boy did my hair thank me! I had spent so much time looking for the best moisturizer and not to mention spent more money than I care to admit, only to realize the damage I was unknowingly inflicting on my hair. Use oils and moisturizes for their true purpose, to trap or seal in water. Now you don’t have to believe me, because your hair will prove will prove me right.
Switch up!
I have said this in a few other of my blog post, as the season’s change you
need to switch up your products. In the winter time we instinctively begin to
adapt and to protect our bodies from the cold, by wearing warm clothing,
putting on a coat when we go outside, and turning on our heat. You wouldn’t walk
outside wearing a tank top, shorts, and sandals when its 20 degrees outside? So
then why would you take the same approach with your hair? In the winter the air
is drier, and colder, so the products that you use should help combat the
effects of winter. The products that you use should be heavier in consistency;
your products should have little to no humectants. Humectants are meant to pull
moisture from the hair into your hair. In the winter the air is
characteristically dry, so you don’t want to attract more dry air into your
hair. Thus, when the climate begins to warm, your products need to change as
well. In the warmer months your products should be lighter, and contain
humectants. Your hair will tell you what its need by the way it feels and the
way it sounds when you touch it.
Don’t go broke over your hair. I have tried almost everything that you can think of. When I first started out, I can remember thinking that being natural is expensive. I was spending entirely way too much money on hair products when I didn’t have to. I have received better results with cheaper product then the expensive products. I remember seeing a product that promised the usual: long, shiny, bouncy, fluffy, blah, blah, blah hair. It had pure tea tree oil, and tit had a hefty price tag to match $300.00! I was beyond flabbergasted, and then I just laughed, because if I didn’t know what I know now I would have probably bought it. I mean why spend 300.00 on a product with “pure” tea tree oil, when you could go to Trader Joes and buy pure tea tree oil for $10.00. I can literally spend less than $20.00 a month to adequately care for my hair. So don’t go broke chasing after hair growth, when you could easily get the same results with cheaper product.
Get rid of the hair type hype- not completely! I think that the hair typing chart is helpful, when used as a reference. I think that when you rely on any information to dictate what you use on your hair, instead of what is actually best for it, that’s where the problem lies. In the beginning I only used products that were best for my hair type. My hair was frizzy, lifeless, dull, dry, and some more stuff. I couldn’t figure out why. Then one day I decided to try something different, instead of using heavy oils and shea butter, I decided to use lighter products. The outcome was more than I expected, that’s also when I realized that I wasn’t the hair type that I thought I was. WHAT???? I went into a complete shock! The lesson that I hope that you will take away from this is take control of your main. Step outside the realm of hair typing, and try new products, even if it’s not for your hair type. If you try a product and it doesn’t work, stop using it, and move on. The reality is that most of us have more than one hair type on our head, so you will never fall into to one hair type, the products that you use can alter your hair texture from style to style, and as you get older your hair texture will change, so what works this year or has worked for many years may not work all the time.
Embrace shrinkage! The more you fight shrinkage, the more you will lose the battle. There are things that you can do to help fight the cause, but you will never be able to completely overcome shrinkage. Some of my tips for fighting shrinkage are; allowing the hair to dry to about 75% and then apply your products, plopping (click here to find out what plopping is), ad using seamless hair clamps on the length of the hair to weigh it down. You can use several methods to stretch the hair out, but it will never eradicate the problem.
Finally, have fun with this journey, and remember its just hair! End of Story! I love my hair, and I am very attached to it, but it’s just hair.
